>Recently enough, the argument for shaving my balls was presented to me. At first i was totally against the idea.
‘How dare you!’ i would scream.
‘I’m a real man’ i would shout.
‘This is how god made me’ and the door would slam.
I couldnt keep running from the argument. Running from the truth.
Eventually i was sold on two issues;
1: Image. Image is everything, allegedly.
2: The illusion of size.
The number three of the two reasons to shave my balls was the biggest deal breaker for me.
I can handle it looking like a former bearded circus midget working in the car boot sale but i couldnt handle the idea that there might be a smell down there.
So, i went off and shaved my crotch. It was a horribe ordeal.
The first few days were weird.
I could tell he wasnt happy with me.
Cowering away, ignoring me, sobbing all night.
I couldnt touch him.
I was getting the cold shoulder alright. I’d crawl into bed and i wouldnt even get a kiss goodnight.
It was tough. But after a few days we worked through it and managed to get over it together and began to enjoy our new hair free life together.
Here’s a list of ten things my shaved balls look like:
2: Krang from ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’
3: A baby bird……but man sized…..
5: The ‘Hey You Guys’ guy from the Goonies.
6: Truman Capote.
8: Someone with leukemia (i wont put up a picture).
9: A James Bond Villain.
10: Bruce Fuck’n Willis.
I like the fact my dick looks like Bruce Willis….and i’m pretty sure he’d be glad that he looks like my dick too.
They might even ask my dick to be a stunt double for Bruce in Die Hard 5.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized
. Bookmark the permalink