>A letter to my litte Nephew

>Dear young master ryan,

So whats your deal? You think your cuter than me? You really want to go down that road? You really want to embarrass yourself in front of the world? Your only six months old, why throw away your future?

(happy half birthday by the way!)

Oh little nephew, your nothing compared to me. You inarticulate piece of shit.

I mean, who the Fuck do you think you are?

Sure you got the hot girls who flirt and dote over you…they call you ‘fat’ behind your back.
Hate to break it to you little nephew but its true. You chubby fuck.

I’m not jealous, i got my own hot girl (pete burns) you might remember her- you felt up her tit the other night. I let it pass because like Israel– I’m fuckin sound.

You know just cos we laugh when you shit your pants, doesnt mean we think your ‘arty’. We think your a smelly little shit bag and we dont find you cute.

We (society) just think your rude.

I have been pretty forgiving with all your social faux paes…that is until i received this email with a picture of you in it.

Sure its funny- to you. But to me its just a small example which only serves to highlight the bigger issue.

The bigger issue is that your a little prick.

This is a blatant imitation of a picture taken of me last november.

I dont care if you’re about to enter the Oedipus complex and need all the help you can get whilst (trying to) over come the infantile urge to fuck your mother- who happens to be my sister (ie stay away from my sister you arab shit).

I am the cuter of us two.

The evidence is ample.

Even in this pic when, admittedly, i dont look the best and maybe a little gay…

Enough is enough, Ryan.I’m gonna kick your ass, you cunt.


About davetheminogue

I'm one of those cynics you're always reading about.
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One Response to >A letter to my litte Nephew

  1. jd says:

    >I thought you ate that kid? He is pretty cute man. Like, you’re cute too. There’s no question about that. I just think maybe you and him could be (don’t hit me) equally cute? Sharing the spot light perhaps? Holla back, I mean.. I could be wrong.

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