I know is christmas and nobody wants to get too serious about stuff but i felt it was my civic duty to do a little PSA on bum cancer.
Bum cancer can and will kill you- if you let it. But it doesnt have to be that way. The easiest, cheapest and most enjoyable way to keep it under control is to push your index finger in and poke it. Poke it like your subtly trying to get its attention. Then turn that poke into a slight push and get your finger out of there. (see diagram).
This lets the cancer know your in charge and that you refuse to let it kill you. If you do this daily you should be ok.
If your under 18 or 5ft its probably best to get an adult to help you.